Stepping back (in)

A few weeks ago, I logged onto my desktop, something I rarely do. Our iMac is old, and slow, but it houses all of our pictures and videos from almost the last 10 years. I sat by myself and scrolled through pictures of all of my births, and our babies firsts. Short videos of a time when we were new parents, without smart phones. Do you remember? I found myself tearing up watching myself play with my babies undistracted.

I've come to the conclusion that social media can and does cause me anxiety. I can handle it in small chunks, but taken as a regular part of my daily round, it makes me anxious. I've "cleaned up" my Facebook page a bit over the last year. I unfriended some people, unfollowed people, and pages, and groups. Lately, the news of the world and of friends has been sad. I can handle sadness, I just can't handle it all coming at me at once. I'd say, like many trying to navigate all the technology in our lives, I'm a bit addicted to my iPhone. I love it, and I hate it all at once. My inattention to my children's requests, has become more obvious. Missing things happening right in front of me because I'm too busy scrolling. So, I'm stepping back from social media, setting some boundaries for myself, and taking a big step back into my life. I've been off of social media, with the exception of a few quick checks of my inbox for a few days, and I've been so productive. I do think social media is very useful, and Instagram doesn't seem to give me the same type of feeling that indulging in Facebook does.

I've been able to finish a few books in my stack.
I started The Quotidian Mysteries back several months ago. I had trouble getting into it at first, because it made clear the things I need to work on in my own life, and I wasn't yet ready to hear it. It's an encouraging read, a message that women can relate to. I've definitely fallen victim to acedia, that feeling that you cannot go on with the monotony of daily life. But, she suggests the nurturing of dailiness can help us to see our potential as children of God, drawing us closer to Him. 

My other three current reads are: Yell Less Love More, Better Than Before; Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives, and The Happiness Project Journal, which is a one-line journal for moms.

On a whim, I bought tickets for Scott and I to see Josh Garrels live over the weekend. What a treat it was! If you don't know of his music, you should! His sound is a sort of folk, hip-hop mix. He tackles more difficult Christian themes, and his lyrics have made me think quite a bit over the last five years or so that I've listened to his music. His new album Home is on heavy rotation over here, but I still love Jacaranda. He's currently touring the Midwest, and catching a show is defiantly worth the time. See his website for details.


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